red, white, and cumin

the fourth of july is the one day in the year tourists from all over the country storm the streets of Capitol Hill. as kevin (read about him here) sings in his second best song, "my city, my city, my home." as d.c. socialites, we daringly braved a night on the town, despite fears of encountering the paparazzi and our obsessive, violent fans.

mtv kept us in the studio late working on our title sequence (coming soon, but we'll include a sneak preview for our readers below), so we missed the fireworks viewing from our friends' rooftop soiree. when we got there, we stood in a corner of the rooftop deck, the potomac river breeze blowing through our hair, singing "all by myself..." quietly to ourselves. (what? nobody was talking to us. they weren't very pleased about the mtv camera crew following us everywhere)

sneak peak at our new title sequence we're working on with mtv.

then we did club drugs.

snorting cumin. please do not try this at home
(unless you want to be exactly like us).

cumin is one of the hottest club drugs on The Hill rite now. it was laced with a few other spices for an extra kick. in true d.c. style, madeline used her smarttrip to split lines for all the interns.

once we were loaded up like amy winehouse, we hit the clubs, obviously.

livin' at tropicalia with my bitches. 

kisses for katie from an adoring fan.

fans everywhere.

we soon grew fatigued by the normalcy of all those around us, their simple pleasures and vapid babblings.

"don't you think that it's boring how people talk

making smart with their words again, well, i'm bored."

-lorde

so we went home to blog. happy fourth of july.

a fun group of pills.

"this is a great, fun group of pills. we're gonna have a lot of fun." -andi dorfman

our readers selected "club drugs" by a landslide.
twice as many people voted for clubs drugs as hookups.
numbers don't lie.

based on our poll about what our viewers would like to see more of, it has become pretty OBVIOUS that you don't appreciate when we go clubbing, you're just using us for our posts about recreational drug use, hookups, and oatmeal creme pies. you know what? fine. here's what you wanted.

tonight we stayed in, despite our plans to hit the town, and watched tonight's episode of the bachelorette while eating pizza and recreationally using prescription drugs. there. are you happy? 

♫ *untz* *untz* *untz* *untz* ♫

after loading up, we began research on andi dorfman's record of cases she has presided over as assistant for the fulton country district attorney. we came across an... interesting... case (found here) where she prosecuted an innocent man and had him sentenced to life without parole because he was black. s/o to marquel for addressing race on the bachelorette (found here). so yeah, we still hate you, andi.

"i hope andi and nick v end up together and go paragliding with broken parachutes." 

-ancient chinese proverb.

(btw, we just learned that andi went to wake for law school. interesting...)

also, if you even care, 

we found kathryn like this. madeline thought it was just like any other afternoon. she thought kathryn was off somewhere in the range rover. but when she walked into the bedroom, she found kathryn lying motionless on the cot. kathryn hadn't slept in the normal bed because someone peed in the bed, and we haven't put the clean sheets back on yet. madeline didn't think it would be a big deal. she didn't know it would change everything. but kathryn didn't make it.

are you okay, kathryn? keep reading to find out.

to her career fair. she napped instead. and then we got whole foods. THERE!! are you happy?!?! just like you voted for in the poll!!! how does it feel?!? is it everything you hoped it would be? and while madeline was photographing kathryn's nap, she fell almost one and a half feet from the bed she was standing on. 

ouch! please pray for madeline.

fyi: katie got dinner tonite with a friend who works for International Justice Mission. we in no way want to trivialize human trafficking in our "red lite district of columbia" post. 

just human sex trafficking. 

just kidding. 

it's serious.